The Last Guide You'll Ever Need

Parents Just Don’t Understand…the Apocalypse

In During the Apocalypse on November 23, 2009 at 2:41 pm

I have just recently been thinking about my supply and what to do and so on. … I know that community will evolve in my town, what worries me about that is the religious lunatics that will make us a danger to our survival. … i don’t own a gun, being 14 and with a mother who dosen’t trust me with one. I have two dogs, one that will probably become food when rations get low, and one that will help with hunting and scavenging…. Also, my neighbor closest to me is a firefighter, he has several safes with ALOT of guns and ammo, so looting his house is a definite possibility. I do not plan on staying in my house, i have considered barricading in my high school, and going to the band room, only room with two exits, and only room that you can go out the window and on to the roof…. Thank you, Rebel

Thanks for the letter Rebel, you ask some good questions about surviving the Apocalypse, but the one I had not thought of before was, “What do I do if I’m 14!”

The first rule of Surviving the Apocalypse is to get out of urban areas. You’re right, there will be crazies and you’re not going to want to hang around to see what crazy cults they form. The problem is, your mom’s got the car keys and she won’t pack you a bag lunch.

Your parents are going to have you on a tight leash and if they don’t head out of town, you probably should bunker down somewhere. Your band room sounds fine, but think about more than fortifications. Does it have access to water? Can you get rid of your shit and piss? Will you be able to build a fire in there to cook? How many rations can you carry? Think about how you’re going to stay alive. If you’re going to survive this thing it’s because you outlasted the zealots. Remember, in a global apocalypse, 50% of people will die within the first month, most from hunger.

Sorry to hear about the gun situation too. I can’t say I blame her for not trusting you, you’re already dreaming up how to eat your dog.  Too bad though, because it’ll be hard to protect yourself in that band room with a saxophone.  I’m not going to recommend taking anything from your neighbor either, that’s up to you. You can save up and buy one, or hey, put it on your Christmas list! Just don’t shoot your eye out kid.

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  1. Hahaha love the answer. thanks for the tips. i knew you werent going to recommend stealing, i don’t approve of it in the normal world, but in a certain situation decisions have to be made. I have been rethinking my housing situation, thanks to you. I myself, with my dog eating and whatnot, might come off sounding crazy. But I’m not… Or atleast I don’t think I am, I just think about these sort of things when i am bored. Anyway thank you, and keep on living.
    Rebel

  2. one room in one large building of many rooms, why not have them all, especially when a high school, like what they try to teach would be a good pick for continued survival. I myself went to a rather large high school (thus making it difficult for one person to occupy successfully, but being alone for the next thirty years or so until you die is not much to look forward to), what is needed is a larger group of trusted friends to help, if they can be found. lucky (or not) was the fact that my high school was designed by the same architectural company that designs our jails, high walls, skinny windows, few doors and sharp angles, it even has crenelations of a sort, and built of concrete and brick, with that inspired 1960s architecture, but anyways, it has all the required materials for a continued survival, mine does anyways.
    first, but not in importance mechanics class has all the tools and maybe even some products for the continued use and maintenance of your vehicles (although where the gas comes from is up to you), electronics, pretty much the same every thing you should need to maintain you electronics (although where the power comes from is up to you), cooking class, for all your culinary needs, and a large sports field that could be easily (ha) tilled and planted (and perhaps a court yard), gym equipment, sewing machines, thread, fabric, wood shop with all you tools and some product I’m sure, drama stage, arts supplies, music supplies, computers, library, and information. It would take time to barricade the windows and concrete up the doors, till the fields and plant the seed but once there it could be easily kept, it also helps if your schools (like mine) is located close to other locations were raw materials, and finished materials could be obtained. This is of course if you planing on standing rather then walking.

  3. Why do people think the apocalypse somehow gives them license to steal? You show up at your neighbor’s place and try to take what isn’t yours and he will give you a few bullets, at 3,000 feet per second! After that, you aren’t going to worry about survival one bit!

    I’d say take up an interest in cooking with simple, staple ingredients, like rice, beans, flour, and the like. Then get your mom to buy in bulk. Get a membership to a Sam’s club or something similar. Rice and flour come in 50 pound bags there.

    Simple meals prepared with simple foods are very cheap and filling, healthy too. Your mom will save money, which everyone wants to do, especially now.

    After things get hairy, you can cook using a solar oven, an improvised wood stove, and a fireless cooker. The Nuclear War Survival Skills manual by Cresson H. Kearny has instructions for both the wood stove and the fireless cooker. It’s free and online. Free instructions for the solar oven are out there too. Recipes as well. In fact, practice now so you know how long things will take to cook. Tell your mom you’ve “gone green”.

    Try to get your mom to buy bottled water in those plastic 5 gallon water cooler bottles. Or a few blue plastic camping jugs. Or get a kid’s wading pool and hope there’s enough water pressure once things kick off to fill it. The one I looked at one day was at least 500 gallons. At a gallon a day, that’s 250 days for you and your mom, more if you can sit it under a drain pipe during a rain storm.

    There’s more but I’m not willing to write a how too manual right now. But your lack of a gun is still a problem.

    Once things go bad, barter a few pounds of rice and beans, some salt and oil, and a jug of water to the neighbor for one of his, some ammo, and some basic instructions. He’ll see you as an asset then, and see it’s in his interest to help you so you can watch each other’s backs.

  4. Thanks Mike Hubert for your interesting advice. By stealing, i meant scavenging/stealing from the dead. I am not sizing up my neighbor’s items to steal in the future. the comment i made was more or less an inside joke, seeing that the neighbors behind him stole his stuff a year or two ago. i see your bartering advice, not anything i didn’t think of already. and i see that you mistook me as being the child of a single mother. i do live with my kind and loving stepfather and my little sister also. the water i don’t see as much of a problem of obtaining living in Washington, and seeing how there is a river only a couple blocks from my house.

  5. Ha, I feel bad for Teens in your situation, Rebel. I’m only 14 myself, but since my dad was an Ex-Marine, He has somewhere between 10 to 15 handguns, a scoped hunting rifle, and a semi-auto rifle (with I think a 30-something clip cap.) I am also a boy-scout, so I have a few survival tricks up my sleeve. To top it all off, I live a whole hour away from Atlanta, in a medium-sized town. I also have enough money to prepare myself if things started to looks bad. I wish you good luck.

  6. Guns guns guns. Americans and their guns. Arrows are the way to go post society-disrupting event (SDE). A bow can be built to have amazing speed and power (and incidentally can cut through a Kevlar vest like butter). The arrows can be made of locally sourced wood (in other words you can make them yourself). The tips can be made from re-used aluminum cans, hammered and shaped or from other melted metals sourced from local looting or trash. You can also dip the tips in poisons brewed form plants you can grow yourself. The effects can range from instant paralysis to instant death, depending on the plant and the concentrations used. A person may be able to walk away from a bullet wound, and come back at you madder then ever. But they cant walk away from being dead. This also means you do not have to be a Robin Hood quality marksman.

    Also, with arrows all you have to do to have a legit excuse for having them is to join your local Society for Creative Anachronism. Look it up. They are everywhere. They use foam arrows in combat recreations, but you can use the real arrows on the driving range or at home if you have the space. Also, get a dart board, it will help to sharpen the targeting parts of your brain. If the SCA is not your speed find a Vikings UK or Vikings America group. They will teach you more then just archery, they will teach you axe or sword fighting (go with axe, less expensive and more useful, and less gear). They will teach you how to make your own clothes, how to melt metal, and so on.

    As to looting. My solution to the theft issue is to knock on the door. Ask for help. If there is someone there, barter or join. If they refuse both options, move on. If there is no one home, loot. The dead need that food less then you do.

    By the way, I think it is great that you are getting interested in this type of thinking this early. Good for you.

    Check out these links:
    http://www.sca.org/geography/findsca.html
    http://www.vikingsonline.org.uk/
    http://www.vikingscanada.org/

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